Old News

I just heard on the news that experts are saying Al Qaeda may be planning new terror attacks. It made me wonder, are the Yankees playing baseball? Is NASA looking at stars? Are bricklayers laying brick, spelunkers spelunking? Perhaps better Breaking News might have been that Al Qaeda is planting an herb garden, or producing a crossover hip hop single with Kelis, my Jihad brings all the boys to the yard? Why is the news so redundant? Are they even trying, or are they just sitting around the newsroom fanning themselves, (whiny voice) “It’s too hot out. I don’t wanna go find news. Can’t we just say what we always say?” Wankers.